Dear Friend,
Thank you for opening this letter—it means more than you might realize. Today, I want to share a confession: I have always loved books on psychology and human development. They offer me a sense of control, a belief that by understanding myself and others better, I can make life more manageable. They often come with actionable steps, promising that if I follow a particular recipe, everything will fall into place.
But the more I work with clients, and the more I reflect on my own life, the more I’ve come to realize something important:
It’s easy to follow a recipe. It’s harder to create your own.
Books and guides can be addictive because they promise quick results, a formula for success. But life isn’t a simple recipe you can follow to guaranteed outcomes. While other people’s blueprints may work for a time, they often don’t lead to long-term satisfaction because they don’t reflect your own unique desires, values, and challenges.
Making your own recipe for life is harder—but it’s also the path to becoming truly yourself.
Following someone else's plan is a safe bet to achieve certain results. But eventually, you might find that these results don't fulfill you because they weren’t what you truly wanted to begin with. People are far too complex for one-size-fits-all solutions. And when you follow a formula that wasn’t designed for you, you’ll eventually feel a disconnect.
Creating your own recipe, on the other hand, is difficult. It requires trust in yourself, a willingness to fail, and the courage to lean into discomfort instead of avoiding it.
Viktor Frankl, the Holocaust survivor and psychologist, understood this deeply. In his psychotherapeutic theory of logotherapy, he discovered that those who survived the unimaginable horrors of concentration camps often did so because they had something greater to live for—a reason to keep going. In short, they found meaning in their suffering.
And this truth applies to all of us. Meaning is a basic human need. Without it, who are we?
You might go through life for a while without thinking about what gives your life meaning. You keep busy, running in the same hamster wheel, until one day you slow down. And in that pause, you may ask yourself: Why am I doing what I’m doing?
Finding meaning isn’t a one-time task. It’s an ongoing process, one that requires imagination, courage, and listening to the desires you’ve buried deep inside. It evolves as we grow. But finding meaning also requires us to confront something else: fear.
Fear is a natural part of the human experience, a signpost that points toward the risks we’re afraid to take. It’s there to keep us safe. But the question is, should we let fear keep us small? Should it stop us from dreaming, from being creative, from imagining the life we truly want?
In my experience working with individuals and entrepreneurs, fear shows up in different ways. Some fear the judgment of others and, as a result, judge themselves even more harshly. Others have built successful businesses, thinking financial security would bring them peace. But once they’ve made it, they hear a deeper call—the call to be more than what they’ve built. They realize that success hasn’t quieted the wounds they’ve carried since childhood.
And when running from those wounds becomes exhausting, when the busyness no longer drowns out the ache, they face the same question: Now what?
So, what do you do when the fear and discomfort arise?
- Acknowledge Your Fear: Fear isn’t a sign that you’re on the wrong path; it’s a sign that you’re stepping into new territory. Instead of letting fear paralyze you, ask what it’s trying to protect you from. Is it failure? Judgment? Or is it simply the unknown?
- Start Small: Take one small step toward your deeper desires. You don’t need to overhaul your entire life to honor what’s calling you. Start with something manageable. The act of moving in the direction of your dreams—even if it’s a tiny step—begins to shift the power away from fear.
- Lean Into Discomfort: Growth doesn’t happen in your comfort zone. If you’re feeling resistance, you’re likely on the verge of something transformative. Trust that discomfort is part of the process.
- Reflect on Meaning: Ask yourself, What gives my life meaning today? Meaning is not something static; it changes as we grow. Take time to reflect on what brings you fulfillment and purpose at this moment in your life.
Where do you go from here?
If you’ve read this far, you’re probably ready for more than surface-level solutions. You’re ready to dig deeper, confront your fears, and start creating your own recipe for life.
Do me a favor. Hit reply and tell me about your fears.
Let's see where life takes you from there.
With love,
Gabe
